Will I sell my soul to the devil
If I go?
Because I feel so.
An offer I can’t turn down,
Irresistible and sweet
Of change and challenge,
Of girl and woman power
Of hard work and man work.
I discovered a lot of weird scripts in my head.
The feminine script goes like this:
Women are not to be trusted.
They cannot defende themselves or their kids.
Women are weak. Women are vulnerable.
They’ll bow before others.
Women are vain. Appearances are much more important to them than essence.
Women will betray me, I cannot trust women.
If I wear makeup, I’m a bitch.
If I become interested in the way I look, I will become vain.
If I wear nice clothes and show interest in my hair, I’ll become dumb and superficial.
Women who get in positions of power are bitchy or they slept with somebody, that’s how they got there.
Women should talk less and do more in the house.
A woman has to be a good housekeeper in order to be woman enough.
Cleaning and cooking should be very important to a woman or she’s not women enough.
I’m not woman enough, as I’m not a good housekeer.
I’m not a good mother, because my kids cry when they see me.
I’m not a good wife, because I let my husband cook.
I’m not woman enough, because I’m not interested in the way I look.
My husband will cheat on me if I’m not a good housekeeper and I don’t look good.
My husband will cheat on me if I am a good housekeeper and I look good (like it happened to my mother).
Or I will cheat, because I’m like my father.
My mother didn’t like me too much because I was more like my father than like her.
Script put in my head by my parents and relatives (most of which were pretty violent towards women).
Some lines were put in my head by myself, after seeing my parents’ reactions.
How do I get rid of the script?