Sumtin’s going rrong, awfuli rrong.

Icanhazcheezburger is not longer that funny, or appealing, or cute. Chocolate is not edible anymoar. I forgets about the concerts I should be attending (Chris Rea, tickets bought 2 months ago!!). Not even serial milk is attractive (though I haz 6 types of cereal now!).

And books………….. let’s see. Due to several days off work, I’ve been wandering in the books. Some P.K. Dick (ok, man was a genius with ideas, I can understand why Aron Biro considers him one of the Top 10 SF writers, but every main character of his books is essentially the same…), Jules Verne (old new collection from Adevarul), Zadie Smith and her less-than-expected interesting “White teeth” (soon to come: comparison/review of Gargoyle and White teeth, both being first novel of their writers), some Anne Tyler.

Yet last year’s Neil Gaiman’s “American Gods” is still the most interesting book read lately. Somehow I’ve become very picky, I fail to resonate with the story and most characters seem dull. Let’s take JV, one of my childhood idols.

I was 14 and I thought Mysterious Island, 20,000 miles under the sea and another Jules Verne book were a-w-e-s-o-m-e. Now I find them interesting for kids (let them expand their horizons and look up for weird fish names). Characters are plain uni-dimensional:  intelligent, curious fellows, good-humoured, civilitators  wherever they get (i just made that word up). They don’t care if they destroy the ecosystem of an island or of the sea, they just want to hunt tigers or whales or whatever they feel like threatening (or brings them good money). Captain Nemo is the only deeper, bi-dimensional individual, with some moral dilemmas and a bit more gray than the rest.

And let’s go to the story. A lot of important technological stuff is done based on one reaction (which I knew was irreversible):

HCl+NaOH->NaCl+H2O.

Is there really any possibility to cheaply transform sea salt (NaCl) into Na+Cl (or similar substances)? This chemical reaction helps the survivors on Mysterious Island do a lot of almost impossible things (obtaining electricity, in the end). It makes Nautilus able to go almost forever through the oceans. A very simple and impossible chemical reaction when you’re on an island or on a submarine, I’d say. But hey, I guess that’s why Jules Verne is among the first SFF writers. I have to admit some of his theories on future are incredibly exact (electricity used everywhere, cars, telecom), although his theory on how the Earth shall die (due to getting colder) have yet to be demonstrated.

Nest: Philip K. Dick… great thinker, dude (see older post here). A lot of imagination, especially in the novelettes. Main character: same male having some problems with money, job, boss, women, solving a big problem that threatens his life/humanity and ending having problems with himself, too. It’s good the action is different almost everytime :D The female characters are either blonde (usually tall), don’t-trust-her-even-if-she’s-your-wife, either brunette (usually small), i-know-she’s-mean-but-she’s-so-cute, either the typical between-2-ages-unattractive-annoying-over weight secretary. Yet somehow they are more distinct from one book to another than the male. I guess K. Dick somehow impersonated someone (or himself?) in that main male, so there’s a common, familiar character in most places. Which is ok, as long as you don’t read 2 novels in 2 days.

Ann Tyler. A sensitive writer, an eager, never-judging observant (a Scorpio that doesn’t judge!!!), loooking with delicate eyeglasses at people’s everyday actions and at a whole bunch of lives, actions, intimacies. She gives me the impression of an old and comfy couch, willing to receive anyone there, be it for watching stupid opera or for some Hitchcock thriller. Or for a sex escapade between a man and some 15-20 years younger female. Or for a usual,monotoneous fight between 2 people that once thought they loved each other (and got married relentless of their annoying habits),who know the fights are in vain and don’t even wanna fight, but they’re in a play and their role is to fight – to show others (and especially to themselves) that things are still going on (we fight, we’re alive!). Sad and cruel, like life itself, but Ann Tyler doesn’t say that, she just records the patterns (my, such a good eye she has for that!), and patterns explain themselves the mechanism of human cowardness, desire to be saved by someone, love in the eye of the far-away beholder, the tiny things that get to drive us mad, kids and how they make you feel so much older and somewhat younger at the same time. Yes, a writer of the people, for the people, certainly appealing to the masses, yet less successful than expected, because most people can’t handle their image so properly un-difused, un-diformed in a book written by someone they’ll never know. My favourite: “The ocasional tourist” (aren’t we all a bit of tourist in our own lives? the only place we truly inhabit is our own self – and P.K. Dick would add “not even that”). Time review here.

Interesting how different writers get to similar essences… I think a good condition for good writing is knowing people, understanding their ticking (Ann Tyler, Zadie). Writers less gifted for that compensate by exceptional ideas (K. Dick, Jules Verne).  There are writers that use words as colours for a painting  (John Banville) or play with them to create metaphors and new poems (like Jeanette Winterson and Milorad Pavic). Other writers don’t have that, but they create new worlds by combining older stuff.

Like Gaiman (another Scorpio to my liking :D ). Gaiman was a God of invention when he thought the saga of American Gods (don’t read any plot summary with names, just read the book!). Basically, the story of immigrants that brought their faith and belief in the brave new world, but soon fogotten their gods (War/Fertility/Earth gods), as new ones emerged – the Media, the Credit Card, the Internet. The old gods, left without worshipers and offerings, are struggling to survive in human form, with miserable jobs and miserable living. New gods are chasing them to eradicate them and modernise people. And people, for whose souls and devoutment this battle is given, are completely careless and un-aware. Is there still place for soul in this mercantile country, where your wife cheats on you with your best friend, where kids don’t listen to their parents, where something is sacre as it has more money value? Each group of gods has their own motivation for struggling on with the people, people that create gods as impersonation of their fears and desires, people that feed gods with their feelings and actions, people that don’t have any god. As interesting as it seems, I don’t remember Jesus Christ appearing too much (or at all!) in the book. But Indian, Scandinavian, African gods are there. JC coul’ve been the host when all these deities came, but he probably got lost somewhere. Or he’s just too busy airing South Park’s TV show. (i’ll definitely burn in hell now… with my minions, Alien and Predator)

***

Alternating between short moments of depression and long moments of annoyance (I cannot be depressed when I’m pissed off).

But life’s good. It would’ve have been even better with some Haagen-Dazs around. Oh, America…

lucrul pe care-l regret cel mai mult e ca nu mai pot alerga; melodia asta (de la Daianara) m=ar face sa-mi iau zborul

Bat for lashes – Glass

Could’ve been yours, could’ve been hers, that delicate and rapid heartbeat.

The fast pulse of a passionate little creature, eagerly waiting to run out of the window and rule the world.

The song which reminds me of spring moisted into summer, hot summer, where flesh takes control and makes dreams come true

I’m so smart I can’t even tell why olive is a vegetable. Or why the sky is blue – I never bothered to keep that explanation in mind. I like to know the sky is blue and this is what I’ll teach my kids “The sky is blue and there’s dust everywhere, but I don’t know why”.

***

Mai demult, l-am intrebat pe tata “De ce ai facut asta?” si el mi-a raspuns “Toti oamenii trebuie sa treaca prin asta”. Mi s-a parut cel mai stupid raspuns posibil, dar acum nu mai pare asa. Si, totusi, nu, nu toti oamenii trebuie sa treaca prin asta; doar pentru oamenii ca el si ca mine e important.

***

Dreams continued with heads and empty furs of polar bears over snow, lots of them, while I cried desperately unaware of what killed them and nobody heard my cries; with me taking my heart out, after a long run with friends, and showing it to the boogie being and eating my heart in front of him, while saying “You won’t have it!”; this repeated scary dream in which I’m shouting in peril, but my voice is so weak no one hears me – if I can escape danger, I go to people and touch them so that they can look at me – or else I face it alone – and wake up almost immediately. And there’s the dream of people over ice, I’m one of those aligned and singing for something good and joyous that happened, and when the songs ends, the thin ice breaks and we start to run happy over it – it’s a nice sense of comunion while singing altogether, although I never hear my voice.

***

deznadejde si speranta, 2 fete ale monedei

***

Some things we have to do by ourselves. Love. Kids. Running towards happiness, whatever that is.

Song: Vangelis – Chariots of fire.

Pornesc postarile cu o leapsa de la Feeria (via Rontiki), ajunsa si la Dorin.

Deeeeeci:

1. Când citiţi, pentru a marca locul unde aţi rămas cu lectura, folosiţi semne de carte sau îndoiţi paginile?

Nu indoi paginile (desi multi ani am facut asa…), tin minte pagina – la cartile citite in metrou. La cele citite acasa, atasez orice: etichete, semne de Polirom, servetele, ambalaje de bomboane, chiar si folii de medicamente.

2. Aţi primit în ultimul timp o carte drept cadou şi dacă “da” care a fost aceasta?

De la ziua mea, am primit tot primit carti cadou. Ultima carte  din cadou (chit ca venit cu putin inainte de Craciun) a fost The Renaissance Complete vol. 8.

Restul au fost: Neil Gaiman – Zei americani  (de la Arheus si Closed2eyes), Elizabeth Gilbert – Mananca, roaga-te, iubeste (de la WeeGee), Jeanette Winterson – Sexing the cherry (de la Octavian) si Milorad Pavic – Ultima iubire la Tarigrad (de la Nada). Toate  potrivite succesiunii starilor mele de spirit. Asa ca profit de ocazie sa le mai multumesc inca o data pentru cadouri :)

3. Citiţi în baie?

Nu prea mai. Am suferit de boala asta ani multi (avand 2 frati, singurul loc linistit din casa era baia).

4. V-aţi gândit vreodată să scrieţi o carte şi dacă “da” care ar fi fost aceasta?

Daaaa, mai multe! Una ar fi autobiografica, alta s-ar ocupa de compararea religiilor, una ar descrie influenta Renasterii asupra lumii moderne… (ideea asta mi-a venit acum)

5. Ce credeţi despre colecţiile de carte de la noi?

Nu-mi aleg cartile dupa colectii, dar cele din Raftul Denisei (Humanitas) sau Nautilus (Nemira)nu m-au dezamagit niciodata. Colectia Cotidianul, fie-i filele usoare, a fost o surpriza foarte placuta; am reusit sa fac rost de carti mult dorite la pret accesibil si am si “cunoscut” cativa autori f. interesanti (ex. Updike).

6. Care este cartea preferată?

Am multe carti favorite… “Pe aripile vantului” va ramane un clasic. “Insula misterioasa” si “20.000 de leghe sub mari”. “Flori pentru Algernon”. “Turist de ocazie”. “Mara” si “Patul lui Procust”. “Mitologiile Olimpului”. “Dune” si “Xenocid”. Nuvelele lui Stanislaw Lem si ale lui G.R.R. Martin si O’Henry. “10 negri mititei” si “Orient expres”. Teatru (imi place tare mult teatrul): Rata salbatica, Nora, Jocul ielelor… Din cartile recente: “Zei americani” si “Domnul Luminii”.

7. Vă place să recitiţi unele cărţi şi care ar fi acestea?

Recitesc cartile care m-au impresionat profund, cartile pe care am vrut sa le iau de la capat o data ce le-am terminat si pe cele care mi-au placut ori prin spirit, ori prin scriere. In copilarie am citit si ras-citit aventurile lui Winettou, romane de capa si spada, povesti si mitologii. Apoi “Pe aripile vantului”, cam o data la 7 ani. Unele carti le recitesc, dupa ani, si imi dau seama, cand le termin, cat de mult m-am schimbat si cat de diferita e noua perceptie asupra cartii…

8. Ce părere aţi avea de o întâlnire cu autorii cărţilor pe care le apreciaţi şi ce le-aţi spune?

Mi-ar fi placut o intalnire cu Lem, parintele Ciberiadei. Si cu Frank Herbert, sa ma inclin (mai mult, n-as sti ce sa-i zic).

L-as intreba pe GRR Martin cum de-si pastreaza coerenta actiunii in cadrul ASOIAF. As discuta cu Orson Scott Card – cat de mult l-a influentat educatia si traiul mormonic atunci cand a scris seria lui Ender.

9. Vă place să vorbiţi despre ceea ce citiţi şi cu cine?

Imi place :) cum nu prea am cu cine in real, ma plimb pe bloguri.

10. Care sunt motivele care vă determină să alegeţi o carte pe care să o citiţi?

Ce determina o frunza sa se coloreze in vreun fel toamna? Cam asa… depinde de dispozitie.

11. Care credeţi că este o lectură “obligatorie”, o carte pe care cineva trebuie să o citească?

Povesti minunate!! bune la orice varsta. Sunt culese din toata lumea si faci cunostinta cu diverse traditii si obiceiuri.

12. Care este locul preferat pentru lectură?

Unul unde sa nu se auda muzica ritmata. Deci: in metrou, la masa, pe scaun, oriunde. Prefer patul :)

13. Când citiţi ascultaţi muzică sau lecturaţi în linişte?

Linisteeee… sau muzica ambientala potrivita.

14. Vi s-a întâmplat să citiţi cărţi în format electronic?

Nu prea. Mai mult nuvele. Paginile sunt mai faine, pot citi si la masa.

15. Citiţi numai cărţi cumpărate sau şi pe cele care sunt împrumutate?

Si, si. In tinerete rupeam bibliotecile. In Bucuresti – mai greu de imprumutat. Acum exista targuri si pot sa cumpar… biblioteca mare sa am, in rest…

16. O carte este pentru mine… Cum aţi descrie o carte?

O incursiune/evadare intr-un univers imaginat de autor impreuna cu mintea mea.

Leapsa merge catre Bursuc (pentru cand incheie cu calatoria neo-zeelandeza) si Lore si spre oricine vrea s-o ia!

Dorinte pentru 2010:

- sa ma balacesc in mare (Grecia, Bulgaria, Turcia) si sa culeg scoici

- sa nu ma schimb prea mult in urma schimbarilor

- sa nu ne schimbam prea mult in urma schimbarilor

- sa nu ma ingras ca un purcel

- sa-mi pastrez partea copilareasca

- sa nu racesc, sa nu-mi rup nimic si sa nu ma mai operez

- sa gasesc The Dress si The Shoes (red shoes!)

- sa nu ma rupa de bani nuntile multe care se anunta

- sa ma pot duce la nuntile/botezurile celor dragi

- sa citesc mai mult, sa scriu mai multe cronici

- sa nu fie criza asa rea (nu se termina, de-abia incepe)

- august sa vie cu vesti bune din toate partile

- sa fiu aproape de oamenii faini si sa mai intalnesc :)

si toate sa fie bine, in general.

As mai vrea ceva, daca se poate: daca tot e sa se intample lucruri, sa fie mai bine distribuite. In 2009, n-a adus anul ce-au adus 3 saptamani din decembrie.

Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end.


What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such.

I thought I wanted freedom, absolute freedom from humans and all things. But absolute freedom – absence of all strings (love, need, desire) doesn’t exist.

I’m no longer chasing the unexistable and I’m taking the freedom which I have. To love and to be loved.

The one thing we can never get enough of is love. And the one thing we never give enough is love.

Am fost o lenesa si nu am postat la timp, apoi mi s-a dus timpul. Dar niciodata nu-i prea tarziu pentru speranta, mai ales cand are vestitori atat de draguti si de de treaba precum Lore si colaboratorii sai. M-a invitat mai demult la Radio Vocea Sperantei pentru o emisiune despre abuz si am facut si spotul pentru “Eu sper” (si am vazut cum arata un studio de radio si unul TV, cool :D si cum se taie sunetele si se lipesc unde trebuie – destul sa fericesc inginerul din mine).

Plec azi si nu am cum ajunge la eveniment, dar sper sa vina cat mai multi oameni :)

WordPress nu ma lasa sa atasez direct .mp3, so this RapidShare file will do for the moment  (i see you have to wait 60 sec…).

Ihope

Pe langa “eu sper”-urile din audio, mai am cateva:

Sper ca 2010 sa fie un an mai bun, pentru toata lumea, decat il anunta sfarsitul lui 2009.

Sper ca schimbarile ce vor veni, indiferent cat de “grave” vor fi,  sa faca tuturora viata mai frumoasa si mai worth living.

Sper ca povestile “triste si cu speranta” pe care le stiu sa devina mai putin triste si mai pline de speranta.

In orice caz, viitorul se anunta interesant, si nu zic asta doar pentru ca plec spre Viena.

Craciun fericit si nu uitati sa sperati!

Wien Market

nu mi s-a inchis operatia de tot, ca sunt grasuta. daca stiam, tineam cura de slabire din timp!

concluzia: pe grasi ii discrimineaza si natura.

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